WTF happened in 2020?!!! In this episode of The Crazy Comedy, Humor & Satire Podcast, Daniel D examines this question -- as well as the question of WTF happened to him and his podcasting during the last few months! But never fear, loyal listeners, Daniel D is back and better than ever.
Transcript of The Crazy Comedy, Humor & Satire Podcast Episode: "WTF Happened in 2020?!!!"
Alright, it’s The Crazy Comedy, Humor & Satire
Podcast, on Saturday, December 26, 2020, and I’m your host, Daniel D,
welcoming you to another groundbreaking moment in the history of podcasting!
Just kidding. Don’t expect me to break any new ground in
this episode. Ain’t gonna happen.
In fact, you probably want to go ahead and lower your
expectations – A LOT! Whatever your expectations are for how a good podcast
should sound, just, get rid of those expectations.
This episode is entitled “WTF Happened in 2020?!!!”
This episode kind of serves as a segue between the past
seasons and iterations of my podcasts and future episodes, since there has been
a break from regular weekly episodes while I’ve been kind of retooling things
on a personal level and as a podcaster. In this episode, I kind of check back
in after my unscheduled and unannounced sabbatical that I have taken during the
last few months of 2020.
Alright, and with that little bit of housekeeping out of the
way, let’s dive right into the question of . . . WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED IN
2020?!!!
I’ll start with myself. What the fuck happened to me this
year? I haven’t done a new episode of either of my podcasts in weeks. So let me
give you a made-up excuse as to why I have not been more productive.
Well, you know how people will say, “So and so dropped off
the face of the earth?”
I always thought that was just a figure of speech. But
that’s kind of what happened to me. I kind of dropped off the face of the
earth.
I didn’t think it was possible, but I managed to do it. So
there I was, on a skateboard, going down a really steep hill; I was going one
way, the earth was rotating the other way; I got going really fast down that
hill; the combined speed of the earth’s rotation and my skateboarding kind of
exceeded the escape velocity for the planet Earth; I hit a rock; and I kind of fell
off the face of the earth and went hurtling into outer space.
I didn’t think it could happen either, but hey! Learn
something new every day!
And that, my friends and fellow humans, is why I haven’t
done a new episode of my podcasts in a long time. It’s kind of hard to do any
podcasting from outer space. First of all, the internet really sucks up there.
There aren’t too many cell towers, so it’s really hard to get a signal. Also,
there’s a slight problem with not being able to breathe, due to the lack of
oxygen, so, long story short, I haven’t been able to do any new podcast
episodes.
Yep, so that’s my story and I’m sticking to it – unless you
don’t believe me, in which case I can give you a different story as to what
REALLY happened. Or if you do believe me, boy oh boy, have I got a bridge to
sell you! In the heart of New York City, the historic Brooklyn Bridge, own a
piece of this iconic landmark for just ten easy payments of $19.95, payable by
cash or money order made out to Daniel D’s podcasting adventures!
If you want to buy a piece of the Brooklyn Bridge, just
check out the show notes for how to contact me.
Anyway, with that explanation out of the way, I just want to
say, I have NO IDEA what the fuck happened in 2020. I don’t know if anyone
does. At some point, I realized that I probably needed to stop commenting on
current events if I didn’t know what in the fuck is happening in the world at
large and that I would probably just be adding to the confusion if I kept
spouting off my views about things. So I took some time off. Kind of did some
soul-searching – made a “searching and fearless moral inventory,” if you will –
and kind of followed good ol’ Timothy Leary’s advice: I turned on, tuned in,
and dropped out. Or maybe I changed what I was tuning in and watching/listening
to/reading. Like, if Life was a radio, I tuned OUT the noise from the religious
wackos on Fox News and MSNBC and their gospel of perpetual outrage – whether
it’s the personality cult of Trump on the Right, or the cult of wokeness on the
Left, both sides, Left and Right, are basically acting just like the worst and
most intolerant and close-minded religious zealots this year – and I got the
hell off of social media, where I really missed all the deep and meaningful and
nuanced conversations happening in 144 characters or less on Twitter – NOT! –
and I tuned into Zen, Daoism, recovery literature, Stoicism, Positive
Psychology, and all that, and kind of compiled my own religious philosophy of
12-step Zen Stoicism. Something like that.
Anyway, I’ve decided to stop doing the What’s Wrong With
America? Podcast, because – confession! – I really don’t have any fucking
answers! I don’t know what the fuck is going on in the world right now. I’m
doing well enough just trying to figure out what’s wrong with me and fix THAT,
I got nothing productive to say at this time about what’s wrong with society –
partly because there is NOT ENOUGH TIME IN THE DAY to even list all the things
that are wrong, let alone talk about WHY they’re wrong or how to fix them. But
hey, I have decided I am going to be more positive in 2021, and talking about
what is WRONG with America and with the ENTIRE HUMAN RACE is too draining, too
much negative energy. So I am going to pretend everything is okay, and I will
stop doing the What’s Wrong With America? podcast – although I will
release this episode in the feed for that podcast, just to say, basically,
don’t expect any new episodes of the What’s Wrong With America? podcast,
but . . . please DO listen and subscribe to The Crazy Comedy, Humor &
Satire Podcast!
Why? Because I AM going to be doing a new and improved
version of The Crazy Comedy, Humor & Satire Podcast, and YOU DON’T
WANT TO MISS IT!!! (“Yeah, Daniel D, like we haven’t heard that one before…”)
No, seriously, it will be NEW and IMPROVED, like all the over-the-counter
medicines on the shelves of your local pharmacy!
Now, I will be emphasizing quality over quantity on this
podcast – imagine that! Quality over quantity in 21st-century
America! – so I’ll be releasing new episodes whenever I have something worth
saying. I will not have a set release schedule. If I have a burst of creative
energy and can put together something good and funny together – even if you
have to smoke weed first for it to be funny or make sense – then I will release
something. And if I look at what I’ve come up with and think, you know, maybe
the world doesn’t need more of this today, then I won’t release anything.
I’ve got another project or two that I’m working on as well.
Like I’m writing a book about my experience with having ADD, but it’s real hard
for me to CONCENTRATE on it. [Sound of rim shot.] But seriously, folks. I’m
also working on a rap album with Pastor Joel Osteen with the working title –
Homies with the Highest – just kidding . . . it’s actually going to be called
“Bitches ‘N Cream.” Yep, move over Sergeant Pepper’s, move over Led Zeppelin IV
and Dark Side of the Moon, rap albums like “Bitches ‘N Cream” is like,
revolutionizing popular music.
On the subject of rap, did you know that a group of country
singers and a group of rap stars have gotten together to create a new style of
music, called “country rap,” which will be abbreviated as “C-Rap” or “CRAP” for
short. Apparently, there is also talk with these country singers and rappers to
add K-Pop boy bands to the mix, and calling this new musical genre “Complete
CRAP!”
But seriously folks, from time to time, I will release
something funny and amusing on this podcast feed. Please be sure to subscribe
to The Crazy Comedy, Humor & Satire Podcast, so that you don’t miss
any of this fantastic new content when it is released on my sporadic and
unpredictable schedule.
And with that, I wish you all a happy belated Christmas, a happy Kwanzaa, happy Hannukka, happy Saturnalia, if you’re an ancient Roman, a happy Festivus if you like Seinfeld and don’t like all this Santa-Clause-shit, and a very happy new year, unless of course, you are Chinese, in which case I wish you a very happy continuation of the old year. The year of the Panda or whatever the fuck animal it is now. It’s Saturday, December 26, 2020, and this is Daniel D saying on behalf of all of us at the Crazy Comedy, Humor & Satire Podcast – and by “all of us,” I mean, of course, just me – God bless us, every one! Peace out, bitches!!!
With an emphasis on QUALITY over QUANTITY (how un-American!), the release schedule may be less regular (like my bowel movements, fool!), so be sure to subscribe to the podcast, so you don't miss new episodes when they drop (like my bowel movements into the toilet, fool). And visit www.CrazyComedyHumor.com for even more craziness!
#WTF2020 #comedy #humor #satire #podcast
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